7ish - I start hearing the squeals of one or more of them
7:20 - Up, dressed and pouring milk in sip-pies for the older two and shaking up a bottle of formula for the baby.
7:30 - All three kids and I are shut into Asher's room. They each take turns getting their diaper changed and their clothes on.
8:00 - Breakfast. Whatever I can come up with. Lately it helps to get everyone started on a clementine. That'll give me a bit of time to scrounge up the next food item without the whines and demands and leg grabbings.
8:30 - I eat cereal while the kids play or watch "The Wiggles"
9:00 - Already been to the timeout corner 5 times for screaming, pushing or disobeying.
9:15 - Second round of diaper changes. This time they are all poopy.
9:30-10:30 - Get out of the house to go any where! Park, Cabella's, Store... It just takes half an hour to get them all in the car.
11:30 - Lunch
12:00 - After a few more rounds of serious explosions from me and time outs for them :) diapers are changed, and we sit down for a few books
12:30 - Hallelujah it's NAP TIME!
2:00 - First round of kids wake up. Get drinks and snack.
2:45-3 - Last of the kids are up now. Ditto above plus change diapers
4:00 - Feed Gooch all together and go get the mail. I start dinner.
5:00 - Daddy's Home!!! We love daddy!! We eat.
6-7:00 - If we're lucky we head to the park then bathes
7:30 - Scriptures, prayers, Bedtime!, and recovery
It's not that the kids are that bad at all. Plus Manny and Rayden spend about 3 days a week now from 9am-7pm with their aunt (the same one that is trying to get custody of them). It's just that I feel busy. I feel like my patience bucket runs out really really fast and I feel like it's taking the happy out of me. I hear myself and think how crappy of a role model I'm being for my own child.
But there are tender moments too. It's fun to see them play together. They are all 3 absorbing so much. Manny repeats prayers, loves the radio turned up so he can sing and dances to wheels on the bus. Rayden has taken his first steps and now says Mom-ma. They eat well and go down for bed like angels.
Every week since the two boys have been placed with us we've been told they would be leaving that Thursday. Well another Thursday has come and gone and we are still shaking up formula and emptying the diaper genie every other day. I'm really not sure when it'll happen but please don't tell me next Thursday!
Today is date night and while Kurt and I could really use the alone time we decided to pack up the kiddos and grab some food to go and have a picnic at the park. By the time Kurt got home I had showered and dressed up, all the kids had their shoes on and their hair combed.
We decided on Pollo Loco except Kurt said he'd let me get Chinese at the Panda Express drive through.
There is a beautiful park in American Fork by AFJr that I've only been to a few times. We decided to go there and picnic. After the kids had finished up and ran off to play I pulled out my fortune cookie. Kurt jokingly guessed it would tell me that I would no longer be the parent of 3 kids or that they would be leaving soon, but instead I read
"Your ability to love will help a child in need."
I cried. I remember before fostering children I did indeed have a lot of love to offer. It was like a ball of feeling I could almost grab and hand out. I knew that I could love many more and I looked forward to the day I would be given that opportunity. I do love Manny, and I do love Rayden. I know it's not to the ginormous extent I feel for Asher but I want them to have the same blessings and to be placed in a home that will feed their zest for life. I also want them to feel the love of a Heavenly Father just as I so often do.
This is a crazy hard time with three little ones but I feel a new determination to offer these two beautiful boys a wadded up ball of love I have inside me, all because of a fortune in a cookie.
Please just maybe offer a teeny prayer that I will allow the Savior to heal my lack of patience.
3 comments:
:) You're awesome Desiree!
Yes you are! Good job writing your feelings! Many others can relate. Thanks for sharing and for being a good example for me! I remember lamenting my lack of patience when Delisa was 18 months old, And I only had 1 at that time. That was a neat message in the cookie and it wasn't just a coincidence! :)
I completely understand what you mean about the patience bucket! For me it was the most difficult when my boys were younger, the older they get, the more helpful they become. I stopped praying for patience at one point and prayed that I could be a more positive mom and the Lord blessed me with a more positive attitude and thus my patience was increased. Good luck, you are doing a great work even when you are overwhelmed, sad or impatient, you are still doing a great work.
Post a Comment