I Wanna Go Home

Braylon has now completed his 3rd 8 hour visit with his mom and dad. In the past they've been confined to public places like McDonald's and visits were limited to 2 hours. Sure he enjoyed every one of his visits, but  Braylon always asked if he could stay longer.

Things seemed to head on a very emotional downhill when he was finally allowed to meet for 8 hours at his parents apartment. He loved every minute of it and his parents understandably showed him the best of time. Going to movies, Build a Bear, to the mall, pretty much anywhere his little heart desired.

On one of these visits Kurt stopped in at our scheduled 8 hr mark to pick up Braylon. He said that as soon as Braylon saw him walk through the door his little face fell. He cried. Braylon didn't want to come home with us anymore. He was that much closer to being back to life as he had left it and didn't want to leave.

Braylon cries. It's mostly those "I can't have what I want so I'm going to make you suffer" cries, but that night he howled in sorrow. It hurt me to see him so upset, and I mean he was upset. I couldn't take offense. I know he loves us, but to a 3 year old your parents are still your heroes no matter what they've done in the past.

Since that experience we talked with his case worker about why this process has become so drawn out and suggested this may not be what Braylon needs. In fact if it were up to him he would be gone already.
The case worker listened and then spoke with the GAL (Guardian Ad Litem) and told us that starting the second full week of March Braylon would begin his trial home visits. That means he'll get to spend 5 days with his parents and 2 with us. If that goes well then he will go home permanently.

The end is in sight for this little guy. It was such an adjustment bringing him into our home but often the biggest shock can be going back to "normal." Our home has changed because of him and will never go back to where it was. Am I sad? Well no not really. I've had some super neat experiences with Braylon, I've learned a lot about the mom I want to be and most importantly I've been able to see the repentance process in action in a sense. The fact that Braylon's parents are working so hard to get him back makes me proud. What a stark contrast to the 8 Harrington kids (Jaren and his siblings) who will not be sent back home because their parents continue to be MIA. I'm grateful for parents who want to be better for their kids and act on that desire. Parents who take responsibility. What a great thing for Braylon to see in a sad sort of way.

Love you forever Mr. Braylonious.