I've dreamt of this day for such a long while
I knew how your giggles would cause me to smile.
I waited it seemed so long just for you
But now it's not me someone else wants you too.
I know your not mine but for now it's ok
Together we'll read stories, color pictures and play.
And when you need someone, dear child I will be there
'Cause, even if only for a moment, you are an answer to prayer.
-Desiree Johnson
I was just thinking about foster care. In a way I suppose it has settled me down in my pleadings for children. I actually don't know that I've prayed to have kids since Braylon came to our home. Sometimes I wonder if I could really handle the long term commitment, but I was listening to Braylon tonight say goodnight to his birth parents and then sing as many songs as we've currently been working on and it hit me again how badly I want my own. How badly I want that cute little voice that I continue to rack my brain thinking up new songs for to sing for me. I'll admit it's better then babysitting but it's not eternal. I'm constantly reminded of that fact every time we get a phone call from his grandma or parents or case worker. But I am happy to give this little time to hopefully helping another family stay together.
If I can give him nothing else I will give him the gift of music. I can see how much he eats it up just like I do when a song touches my soul. What an experience foster care is. I am learning so much about myself. All I know is that we only have maybe 5 to 8 months left to try and memorize as many nursery rhymes and songs as his little heart desires.
Today was a pretty good day. It was pretty busy but we all seemed in good spirits which lead to a very happy and eventful day (except for the pooping in his pants part at the end of the day, but he was gonna get a bath any way... sigh). We took Braylon to see Santa and the only way I could get him to sit on Santa's lap was to sit on his lap first and let Braylon take a picture of me, then it could be my turn to take a picture of him. Braylon's mom really wanted a picture of Braylon on Santa's lap and while it took more coaxing then I thought I hope this picture satisfies.
Here are a few more of our snow day fun and Temple Square date night
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| Eatting Gelato after Pizza at Settebello. I love that smile |
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| Kurt and Bray made snow angles in the field by the parking lot |
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| "Let's do it together!" |
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| Getting ready to be pulled in the sled behind the truck |
4 comments:
Alright, I think you are officially the most lovable girl ever. If there ever comes a time when I can't take care of my kids will you take them please?? It looks like so much fun over at your place.
What a wonderful job you and Kurt are doing. This little boy is glowing with happiness. What a blessing you are in his life. I know that you are going to be blessed as well. Your pictures made me tear up. Merry Christmas to your sweet family!!
Des, i've been thinking a lot about your comment where you said it's not eternal. The thought that keeps coming back to me, since last night when I read this is, although Braylon may not necessarily be yours for eternity, you are making a very real eternal impact on that little boy. He will always remember the love and spirit that he felt while safely in you and Kurt's care. I have no doubt that the experiences and feelings he is gaining will stay with him and effect him his whole life. Then, one day when we are all on the other side Braylon will thank you for opening your home to him and for teaching him about the gospel and helping him feel the spirit through songs and love. That is eternal. You and Kurt are extremely special people. Heavenly Father knew that only you two could impact lives the way you do. The children that come into your home will forever be blessed and when you have helped the children the Lord needs you to then I'm sure you will be blessed with children to call your very own and hold for all eternity!
I just LOVED the poem you wrote at the first of this post. SO TOUCHING!! Just wanted to let you know how amazing you and Kurt are!! Just look at all that happiness and love in those photos! I think any child is lucky to spend time in your care...no matter how brief... the positive impact will last for eternity for you and for them!! SO SING YOUR LITTLE HEARTS OUT!!! Every song is a prayer going in the right direction.
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